There she is, sitting at my inner desk,surrounded by spreadsheets and pink eraser rubbings. She’s scrubbing at her temples, running the numbers, planning, preparing, making projections. I just want to know things are going to be okay,she says. She is worried. She is always worried.I do not try to stop her. Her heart is golden,and her longing to help is […]
for LB In the dream, I hand him a skein of evergreen yarn. He cups his palms below it as if receiving communion, then squeezes the fine wool, testing its softness, its strength.Finding it worthy, he nods at me as I offer you the half-knitted hat, the yarn still attached to the needles, the other end of the yarn held in his […]
It was beautiful, wasn’t it, the gray of pre-dawn, the way the horizon was more suggestion than line?And it wasn’t too cold, was it, the Pacific, as we waded in,together, not together, two humans drawn at the sametime to walk back into the salt water that long ago our ancestors walked out of. Last week, I walked with […]
for all the Jane Does Walking through the rain-damp grass,cool morning air startles me into being, and I realize how the news of violence against womenhas numbed me. So quickly the body remembers its wounds and shuts down.This morning the yellowing cottonwoodleaves are so bright, the chokecherryleaves so red, and the bird overhead keeps calling out, bringing me here, here […]
O the mind, mind has mountains; cliffs of fall Frightful, sheer, no-man-fathomed. —Gerard Manley Hopkins, “No Worst, There Is None” We fear the cliff, the dangerous edge, but here on the banks of the San Miguel River, I see how even the cliff is in service to life—how even in the steepest reaches of the canyon, the blue spruce and pinion […]
for my brother I wasn’t able to get Johnny Cash to return from the dead to sing“Ring of Fire,” but I did order a big bouquet of orange and yellow flowersin a ceramic pumpkin to arrive at your door.With a candle. It can be so vast, the difference between what we wish forand reality. As it is, I would […]
Inside me is a reservoir of hope. It has been backed up so longby a dam of rationality and fearit has almost forgotten it was once a river. It’s become slack and fecundand way too still.Once it moved freely, transforming everything it touched;once it brought changeand nourishment and life.Hope was never meant to be trapped,to be tamed, commodified, it […]
when I feel as if my feetare fashioned of mudand my tongue is made of sand, when my thoughts and emotions grow stagnant as if trapped behind a dam of self, that is when I remember there is a silence inside meever waiting for me to slip into it. That silence is patient as a lakeuntouched by wind. No matter the […]